Doug Weaver, an artist and educator, and his wife Kirsten, are committed to supporting their son Finley in embracing his unique identity, even if it means facing criticism from some of his classmates' parents. In a heartwarming story, the Weavers share their journey of empowering Finley to wear pink, love rainbows, and paint his nails without fear of judgment.

Empowering Finley to Be Himself, One Nail Polish at a Time

Navigating the Shift from Kindergarten to First Grade

When Finley, now 8 years old, was in kindergarten, he loved rainbows and unicorns, just like many of his peers. However, as he moved up to first grade, Weaver noticed a shift in the way his son's classmates reacted to his interests and self-expression. Some of the kids began commenting on Finley's choice of clothing, suggesting that he shouldn't wear pink and that unicorns were "for girls." Weaver knew he had to take action to support his son.

Leading by Example: Weaver's "Pinkification" of His Life

In a TikTok video, Weaver shared his approach to supporting Finley. "As soon as my son started coming home from school with that messaging, when his peers started saying that he shouldn't wear pink and that unicorns were for girls, I added so much pink to my wardrobe. I 'pinkified' my life." Weaver also painted his nails, recognizing that if Finley went to school with his nails painted, the other parents might question it. But if they saw Weaver's nails painted as well, they would realize that the issue was not with Finley, but with their own preconceptions.

Fostering a Supportive Environment at School

Finley's current classmates have embraced his individuality, and Weaver is grateful for this. "Even in his small class this year, there are a few other kids who go against traditional gender norms," says Weaver. "Seeing those other kids in the classroom is comforting for him and helps him be more bold about his own decisions." Finley's classmates "know him and love him for who he is," Weaver adds, which is a testament to the inclusive and supportive environment they have cultivated.

Balancing Encouragement and Acceptance

While the Weavers are fully supportive of Finley's self-expression, they also recognize the need to balance encouragement and acceptance. Weaver has noticed that Finley sometimes paints his nails on a Friday night, so the color will have faded by the time he goes to school on Monday. "He has his own choice of how much he wants to go through, or how much anxiety he wants to have about it," Weaver says, acknowledging that the "act of resistance" often has to be tempered with "self-preservation."

Exposing Finley to Diverse Perspectives

The Weavers have made intentional choices in where they live to expose Finley to a variety of people with different backgrounds, viewpoints, and preferences. This exposure helps Finley see the "rainbow of choices" available to him as he grows. Weaver, who grew up as a "theater kid" in a small Oregon town, understands the pressure to conform to traditional gender norms. He is determined to provide Finley with a more inclusive and supportive environment.

Celebrating Finley's Authentic Self

Despite the occasional negative comments, Finley is thriving and doing well at school. The Weavers' unwavering support and their commitment to creating a nurturing environment have allowed Finley to embrace his authentic self. As Weaver says, "Finley's current classmates 'know him and love him for who he is,' and so do his parents." The Weavers' journey is a testament to the power of unconditional love and the importance of fostering an inclusive and supportive community for children to grow and flourish.